Extremism and Maturity
Lately, I've been thinking about extremism and maturity and what these two ideas hold for each other. Are they opposites? Someone can easily say that to be mature is to be able to compromise and find the middle-ground. Or are they complements? For being mature enough to know you want and then not settle for less is mututally beneficial.
People always say that I'm mature - wise beyond my years and able to handle the rigors of life extraordinarily well for someone my age, which assumes maturity comes with time and experience. I can say that I've had my fair share of experiences in my lifetime, probably more than most 22-year-olds. I've been challenged by others and by myself and because of that, I've come out strong and able to roll with life's punches. I know that nothing is forever - friendships can reblossom, people can die, ability can be restored, a moment is a moment, and things will never be the same way they were yesterday.
So, with that, does maturity foster compromise or extremism? If someone understands that things are temporary and transparent, would they invariably search for something present and permanent in their lives? Would they be extremists in the sense that they won't settle for less than what they're looking for? Would we say that people who spend their whole lives looking for their soulmates are mature? Or is that when someone understands that life is made up of moments, that they only seek to share in an isolated moment and therefore are willing to compromise what they really want for what they want, right now?
But maybe to be mature is to know how to juggle both - to strive towards your ideals while being able to still enjoy the path you take to get there. Maybe maturity not only assumes time and experience, but also being able to use that time and experience to make future time and experience worth living.
I used to be an extremist about everything, but I find myself slowly changing with the seasons. I'm more able to let people pass through my life, appreciate people for who they are trying to become, let go of old dreams, and remember the times when things were perfect and I didn't hope for more - for friendships can reblossom, people can die, ability can be restored, a moment is a moment, and things will never be the same way they were yesterday.
People always say that I'm mature - wise beyond my years and able to handle the rigors of life extraordinarily well for someone my age, which assumes maturity comes with time and experience. I can say that I've had my fair share of experiences in my lifetime, probably more than most 22-year-olds. I've been challenged by others and by myself and because of that, I've come out strong and able to roll with life's punches. I know that nothing is forever - friendships can reblossom, people can die, ability can be restored, a moment is a moment, and things will never be the same way they were yesterday.
So, with that, does maturity foster compromise or extremism? If someone understands that things are temporary and transparent, would they invariably search for something present and permanent in their lives? Would they be extremists in the sense that they won't settle for less than what they're looking for? Would we say that people who spend their whole lives looking for their soulmates are mature? Or is that when someone understands that life is made up of moments, that they only seek to share in an isolated moment and therefore are willing to compromise what they really want for what they want, right now?
But maybe to be mature is to know how to juggle both - to strive towards your ideals while being able to still enjoy the path you take to get there. Maybe maturity not only assumes time and experience, but also being able to use that time and experience to make future time and experience worth living.
I used to be an extremist about everything, but I find myself slowly changing with the seasons. I'm more able to let people pass through my life, appreciate people for who they are trying to become, let go of old dreams, and remember the times when things were perfect and I didn't hope for more - for friendships can reblossom, people can die, ability can be restored, a moment is a moment, and things will never be the same way they were yesterday.
posted by Quyen @ 9:28 AM
5 Comments:
At 2:08 AM ,
Mogwai said...
This is an interesting point you are making. To me, maturity is fluidity. The more mature a person is, the more easily they adapt to a given situation. The easier they adapt, the wiser they have become, learning from past mistakes.
Maturity is not linear, wisdom, to me, is. You must have experiences, both successful and unsuccessful ones in order to learn from them.
People who don't know me very well, upon hearing that I am 25 and have already gone through a divorce, do the whole pity thing toward me and it drives me nuts. I have learned so much more from that one event than I ever would have if I would have remained married. I was happy when I was married, but ignorance is bliss. I think I will make a much better husband and companion the second time around than I did the first. This is wisdom.
The ability to cope and turn events into learning situations is also a sign of maturity. Though, I think for everyone maturity takes on a slightly different meaning.
At 6:53 AM ,
David said...
Did you kidnap Grace?
At 9:22 AM ,
David said...
Grace is lost, help me find her.
http://vangogh.17style.com/
At 10:59 AM ,
Calvin said...
i feel maturity is this definition of yours:
But maybe to be mature is to know how to juggle both - to strive towards your ideals while being able to still enjoy the path you take to get there
At 2:15 PM ,
Handsome B. Wonderful said...
I agree with your conclusion that maturity is being able to balance both extremism and compromise.
I am a buddhist so I also believe the balance of all things through the "middle way." I think if you stick to the middle way then you will almost always be content with the present moment (or at least understand the reason for the present moment and be able to "roll with it" so to speak).
Great post.
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home