Sexy, Dirty and Everything Flirty: November 2005

Seven People Broke Up With Me :(

I'm kinda bummed out. I've lost 7 students in the past couple of months. Not only is that a pretty good cut in pay - about $300 a month, but also, these are students who I've invested so much time and effort into. I'm sad to see them go :(

Teaching is like managing tons of little relationships. You have to be so much wrapped all into one. You have to make your students feel good about themselves, highlight their flaws in a gentle manner, always be patient and ready to explain yourself, look out for their best interests over your own, always push them to be their best, and so much more.

So, when a student stops studying with you, it's like they're breaking up with you. You get all those same feelings you get when a relationship ends. You start to question whether or not you were good for them, or whether their heart was really in it. You start to wonder if they ever enjoyed their time with you, and you wonder if the reason they left is because of you.

It's funny that there is a parallel between teaching and relationships. Remember how it felt when that one special person broke up with you? Now imagine 7 people breaking up with you, one right after another. It really breaks my spirit :(

Thanksgiving :)

If I could tell how I how my Thanksgiving was in one word, it would be intimate. I spent nearly 10 hours cooking an entire Thanksgiving feast on my own.

On Wednesday nite, I cooked from 9PM to 1AM baking two homemade pumpkin pies from scratch, cubing a whole loaf of bread and toasting it in the oven, mincing and chopping green pepper, parsley, onion, carrots and celery for my homemade stuffing, rinsing and cleaning the 12 lbs. turkey and seasoning it inside and out, boiling the neck, gizzard, liver and heart with chicken stock to make the gravy stock, and washing all my dishes in preparation for the next day.

On Thursday, I woke up and started cooking by 10AM. I made my mom's 3-layer cream Jell-O, sauteed the remaining ingredients for the stuffing and combined them with the gravy stock to keep it moist while baking, seasoned the turkey again and then stuffed it until it was spilling out, mashed 5 lbs of potatoes, and all the while, cleaning my apartment from top to bottom to make sure everything was super clean for my guests. I stopped running around with my head cut off around 4PM.

I had 7 guests total: my co-worker, one of my best g/fs and her b/f, my best friend, a couple of old friends from school, and one new friend :) All the people who were invited didn't have the opportunity to spend Thanksgiving with their families. That was the whole theme this Thanksgiving - since I couldn't go see my family, I wanted everyone else who was in my situation be able to spend a nice Thanksgiving with someone and eat a great meal :)

Everyone really enjoyed the food, and I practically had no leftovers! We watched Rat Race, played some Gamecube, played Cranium, and some of my guests ended up lip-locking at the end of the nite :P All-in-all, it was rewarding. I spent so much time cooking that when I could see my friend's faces when they were eating, it really made me happy :) In that way, I would say that my Thanksgiving was intimate: 8 people coming together to form a temporary family, enjoying one another's company along with a great meal and going home knowing they had spent time with others instead of braving the holiday alone, at home :) Knowing that made all the work worth it ;)

Goals Revisited

Let's hope I break last week's 6 1/2 points ;)

1) Get someone to burn me some Tiesto (1 point)
- My friend Edgar lent me a whole set of Tiesto, PVD, and trance mix CDs. I also got my sister to burn me some of her fave mixes and Mogwai was kind enough to offer to send me some too :)

2) Get my oil changed (for real this time!) :P (1 point)
- Yes! No car breakdown for me! :D

3) Wash all my dishes (and keep it from piling up for awhile) (0 points)
- I'm STILL a dirty pig...

4) Start practicing Kung Fu by myself (0 points)
- I'm ALSO a lazy ass...

5) Go get a full body massage (1 point)
- Got one, but it wasn't that great :/

6) Go to Bath & Body Works' new Grand Opening and get my promos ;) (1 point)
- The tank top I got is super cute! And I might start carrying my materials for teaching in the pink leopard tote ;) I also got sold on Murad's acne complex kit and their tinted SPF 15 sunscreen - it's like makeup that's good for you! :D

7) Re-do my budget and start tracking my expenses! (1 point)
- I did my budget, and I've narrowed it down to about $1,830 a month. So far, I've been really good about not going over on my weekly budgeting :)

8) Make a list of people I have to shop for for Xmas (1 point)
- It's funny. When you try to make a definitive list for anything, someone invariably gets left out or someone else will invariably be crossed out in the following weeks :P

9) Cook something I've never tried to make before (1 point)
- Thanksgiving dinner, baby! ;) (And yes, I still get a point even though I'm cooking tomorrow :P)

10) Decide what piece I'll be playing for my recital in December (0 points)
- I'm indecisive.

CONCLUSION: 1) Budgeting is great! 2) I'm an indecisive, lazy pig-ass :P

POINT TOTAL: 7 points

Meditation with Dan

Tonite, my good friend Dan came to visit and offered to lead a guided yoga meditation. I was hesitant at first as I was trying to win at solitaire, but I eventually gave in to turning the lights off, clearing some space on the floor, and lighting some candles.

As I was getting deeper into the breathing and the meditation, my work became a mesh of Wicca, yoga, and Kung Fu. I started to expand my energy, stretching myself into all the corners of my apartment. We internally chanted, "An open heart heals the world". Then, when we were done, we laid on the floor and closed our eyes.

As I closed my eyes, I had an out of body experience. When I was younger, I used to experience it all the time. But tonite, my alter ego fell from inside of me. She then sprang up into the night air, and upon finding it cold, sprouted a flurry of flowing white banners from her back. I could feel and see what she was feeling and seeing. And when her luminous wings sprang from her, it felt so warm. She lowered herself to my physical body which felt like a vessel, a carcass, and she looked at me. I could see myself through her eyes and I looked so tired and unadorned. She came and hugged me and laid her head on my shoulder. And it felt so good. So good.

She then hovered over me and spoke words inside my head: "You are an angel, and we are one in the same. You are the angel of war. You are the angel of beauty. You are mother to us all, and everyone's worst adversary."

When I was cuddling with myself, I felt like it was yin and yang working together. There was the angelic part of me that wants so badly to care and love someone right now and there's the tired and raw part of me that wants to let go and be weak and vulnerable and be taken care of. And they were taking care of each other. They were satisfying each other's needs to love and be loved. But it was all self-love. Beautiful, comforting self-love.

And she reassured me of my place in the fabric of existence. She reminded me of who and what I am. She reminded me that I have wings of flowing white that I need to stretch once again.

Yay for the Laundromat :P

So, I know I'm not the most exciting or glamorous person in the world, but doing laundry in my PJs on a Friday nite is pretty much the opposite of exciting and glamorous :P It's okay though, since I work early on Saturdays.

I also have to work on Wednesday and Friday of next week, which means I'm not going back to San Diego for Thanksgiving. At first, I was all bummed out because I didn't know what I was going to do for Thanksgiving. But then I decided to take matters into my own hands and said, "Damnit! I'm gonna make me a turkey!" I then proceeded to call all of my friends and invite them to my Thanksgiving dinner for the family-less :P Then I remembered that I've never cooked a turkey-anything before. What did I get myself into? :P

On the upside, making Thanksgiving dinner takes care of one of my "weekly goals" :P That's 6 goals I've bagged so far, this week! :D Yay for goal setting and accomplishing things you should anyway! ;)

As for the laundromat, two good things came from that: 1) I have fresh laundry and 2) I weighed myself - 149 lbs. baby! ;) *sizzle* :P

Personality Test - So True!

Your Personality Profile

You are sexy, powerful, and bold.
You're full of passion and energy...
Sometimes this passion has a dark side.

You feel most alive when you're seducing someone.
You never fail to get someone's attention.
Quick minded, you're also quick to lose your temper!

The World's Shortest Personality Test

10 More Goals

- Get someone to burn me some Tiesto
- Get my oil changed (for real this time!) :P
- Wash all my dishes (and keep it from piling up for awhile)
- Start practicing Kung Fu by myself
- Go get a full body massage
- Go to Bath & Body Works' new Grand Opening and get my promos ;)
- Re-do my budget and start tracking my expenses!
- Make a list of people I have to shop for for Xmas
- Cook something I've never tried to make before
- Decide what piece I'll be playing for my recital in December

How I Did...

So last week, I gave myself 10 goals. Here's how I fared:

1) Get a French manicure and pedicure (1/2 point)
I got the French pedicure, but not the manicure. I tried out this foot spa that only does feet! This little Vietnamese girl was meticulous! My feet looked perfect after I was done! Unwittingly, I went shoe shopping right afterwards and fucked up my paint job :P

2) Get my oil changed (0 points)
I've been putting this off for so long. I didn't get around to it, but hopefully I will this weekend.

3) Get free promos from the new Bath & Body Works by spending $30 (0 points)
They put off the Grand Opening until this Thursday :( So, it's not really my fault that I didn't do this because I was there at like 10AM on their Grand Opening Day. Don't worry, though. I'll be there bright and early tomorrow :)

4) Go visit my old Kung Fu class (1 point)
After trying on expensive jewelry that I can't afford at the Beverly Center, I went to visit my Kung Fu class. I made my rounds and got caught up with everyone, and it made me realize that I really miss them. It was the same old people doing the same old things, and there's something comforting about that. I decided that I'm going to start practicing on my own and then taking classes again once the semester ends. I've also realized that ever since I stopped practicing Kung Fu, my skin has gone to shit. So, I can rationalize the $100 for tuition by substituting it in my budget for my monthly facial :P

5) Wish Justin and Chris a Happy Bday (1 point)
Although I still have to give Justin a Bday present, I did call him (2 days late :P). For Chris, I took him to see a piano trio and then to Black Angus for our annual Bday tradition, among other things :P

6) Eat at a new restaurant (1 point)
I should get like 6 points for this because I ate at like 6 new restaurants! :D

7) Wash all my dishes (0 points)
I'm a dirty pig :P

8) Invite 5 people to my string quartet concert (1 point)
I invited Chris, the other Chris, Sifu, Joshua, Daniel, and Afshin to tonite's concert. If anyone else wants to come, it will be at CSUN's recital hall at the south end of campus at 8PM.

9) Go see the Gramercy Trio perform (1 point)
They were pretty good and I got to have a really fun masterclass with them the following day in which they showed us some fun new techniques for quartet playing :)

10) Go to Amoeba Music and get a Paul Van Dyk CD (1 point)
I got his CD called "Out There and Back". I'm not sure how much I like it yet. My friend and I were listening to it in his car and he's like, "This sucks. Let's put on some Tiesto!" Now, I'm a Tiesto fan :P

TOTAL POINTS = 6 1/2

10 Goals for the Week

- Get a French manicure and pedicure
- Get my oil changed
- Get free promos from the new Bath & Body Works by spending $30
- Go visit my old Kung Fu class
- Wish Justin and Chris a Happy Bday
- Eat at a new restaurant
- Wash all my dishes
- Invite 5 people to my string quartet concert
- Go see the Gramercy Trio perform
- Go to Amoeba Music and get a Paul Van Dyk CD

Halloween 2005 :D

So, this year, I'm actually posting pictures like I said I would :) These were taken at West Hollywood's Carnaval - the largest Halloween celebration in the world! Over 350,000 people show up here to see and be seen, and it's considered a compliment when someone thinks your costume is kewl enough to want to take a picture with you. So, here are the ones that made it into my camera ;) Enjoy! :D